Friday, April 29, 2011

Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

Sorry, Dodge, but you don’t know what I’m thinking.

I’m thinking you’ve made a mistake attempting to position the Grand Caravan as the real man’s van. Sure, it’s a Dodge, a member of the most macho of vehicle lines, but it’s still a minivan, and minivans have the stigma of being a soccer mom’s vehicle, i.e. a momma van. You can’t cross that chasm.

Men can’t escape the stigma of driving a minivan.

I’m thinking it takes more than a leather trim command center to get a male to hoo-ah over a vehicle. Especially a minivan.

I’m thinking a 506 watt Infinity surround sound is overkill for singing along to “If You’re Happy and You Know It”, “A Peanut Sat on the Railroad Track” and “You Are My Sunshine”.Chuck E. Cheese's birthday party

I’m thinking almost 300 horsepower will give mom the giddy-up she needs to race across town in 12 minutes to get the kids to Chuck E. Cheese’s on time for the birthday party.

I’m thinking the “sudden'” realization that he’s sitting in a minivan isn’t going to inspire him in the least to have children. Not even almost.

I’m thinking this has been tried before: Pontiac attempted to lasso guys into believing the Montana was for men of the wild, wild west.

The quality of the Montana was akin to the quality of this video…pretty crappy.

They failed miserably. What makes you so smart, so certain your creative and messaging will keep the Grand Caravan from suffering the same fate? Learn from the lessons of the past.

In the final analysis, Dodge, I can’t help but wonder what you’re thinking.

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